Update With The Truth

So, it seems that I am wrong. I know, it's hard to believe. But it's really true.

I figure that by my 5th pregnancy I would know more about my 'dates' than the doctors. SO, my due date for myself was May 21, 2011. While at the same time, I understood the doctor's due date for baby's arrival was May 26th, 2011. I thought I was right (for reasons I won't outline here) always knowing, in the end, it really wasn't a BIG deal because it's only a difference of 5 days.

Well that was a BIG mistake. The poor people that follow my due date were expecting something to happen a WHOLE 7 days ago. And still....nothing. But the truth can finally be known, based on my official due date of May 26th I'm actually only 2 days overdue.

SO, now that the doctor has proven more knowledgeable about me, than I am of myself. I can now say I was 3 weeks away from my due date with the pregnancy portraits taken AND I was 7 days away when setting up an event for 420 people. SO, I'm not as accomplished as I once painted the picture for.

Having said all that, I should probably update on how it feels to be 2 days overdue. Well, it's not that bad really. I've never delivered early SO it's not really a big surprise. However, I have been uncomfortable for 3 days, thinking baby might arrive. I have had minor anxiety attacks asking myself WHY I'm back in this awkward predicament AND I have not really realized the true magnitude of the effort of labor and delivery. So, I've had moments where I've "checked out" on the family, I've cried feeling overwhelmed and I've momentarily wished I could be anyone else BUT myself at this exact moment. Basically a pity party larger than I've ever experienced before.

Hopefully, I can snap out of it. This honestly is a first for me with the situation of not taking an active role in the home and 'checking out'. Hopefully I can find the strength to positively proceed through labor and delivery AND my kids can have their fiesty/energetic Mom back.